Wow, spring has finally sprung from this long, dark, COLD wintertide...but still the chilly fingers of Jack Frost haven't let go...The mornings are often very cold still...
In the meantime we've worked on our garden, my potted herbs and even gotten an air/duct sealing for our home (for free!). We've worked very hard on getting more frugal with our lifestyle, reduced/eliminated some debt and will even be able to have some savings soon (in case of job loss). So many positive steps...
However, recently I've had to step back from an increasingly unhealthy situation...and it's been difficult. I'd been back and forth on how to handle it...and every time I thought, "Well, maybe..I'll just do this,...or ...I'll just help out here..", I'd get requests to do even MORE! "Do this! We need this!" There were several creative ways to "get the job done" without me, but they "can't see the forest for the trees" evidently.
I didn't want people who I've really come to like and admire think bad of me...but since they don't know the FULL details of what my family's dealing with on a financial, wellness/health and psychological level, I simply can't expect them to understand. Some have a small inkling, but aren't sympathetic as several others are dealing with health-related crises of their own. The one thing I didn't bring up to these folks is that this all happened during February/March, leading up to the most difficult part of the year for me. It dawned on me that my son's death still affects me to this day, and the grieving process intensifies problematic situations. I discussed the problem extensively with the two people who were present on the worst day of my life (the stillbirth of our son), and they both agreed with me; I had made the right decision to stand firm in my departure from this group. The relief is palpable, I didn't realize I had had been doing so much work for so long! It may get nasty, but come what may, I can finally say I made the right decision for me, my family and ultimately, for them.
So on to May Day...a Spring Sabbat to celebrate with Mirth and Joy; release burdens, and open up to new mysterious possibilities!
2 comments:
They need to learn that you aren't the public library. Volunteers should be cherished and encouraged, not used and demanded of.
I support whatever you do as long as you are taking care of your own best interests.
Happy spring!
I've realized something else - all the energy spent elsewhere left our family history undone. I've years of scrapbooking, research, and photo scanning to do! Just the organization to do all that is daunting...I feel good about devoting time to our families' documentation, not to mention having a clean bedroom!
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